Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Kissing for Dummies

We have all spent some time (come on, be honest!) checking out how-to books. There are many to choose from - internet for dummies, how to cook, how to speak a second language, how to be a better lover, to name a few. The latter have always been amusing to me.

I thoroughly enjoy a few of the premium adult channels on occasion. I especially get a kick at playing "I Spy.” I count the number of crotch patches caught on film in each flick (LOL). I have to remember to write them a note via e-mail one day to ask the camera man to stay away from the "patch area.” It kinda ruins it, for a person such as me, who is looking for a few new ideas and motivation.

Last night, I watched a romantic comedy called "Love and Sex" on cable. It was very interesting and funny. The story is about a woman who drifts in and out of relationships before she falls for a commitment-reluctant artist. They had scenes that are to die for. For example, after a year into this final relationship, the artist decides to end the relationship just as they turned in for bed. He also compares long term relationships to a cheese sandwich. On the flip side, it would be nice to see a movie mad on just kissing.

I was discussing the topic of kissing with a male friend the other night. I mentioned how a girlfriend of mine was disappointed in the way her first date went because of a rough kiss goodnight. He stated frankly that she was not being fair; after all, everyone kisses differently. She should not complain, she should adjust. I smirked at the comment. Who would accept that option?!

So, while we may enjoy some rough play on aggressive days, I believe it is safe to say that a sexy kiss goes a long way. I decided to blog down a few steps to successful kissing:

1. Roll up your sleeve and locate the inside fold of your arm (where your elbow area is). Hopefully, you can reach the area (smile)
2. Kiss into the inside fold of your arm so that you can determine your style.

* If your arm feels as though you were attacked by sharks, you are too rough
* If your arm feels as though you were being kissed by your dog, you are too sloppy
* If you get turned on during this process, you need to get out more

There is no harm in practicing. Kiss on, my friends!

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